Imagine going to sleep, waking up and finding out you killed somebody.
That's exactly what happened to me.
Two years ago, I was drunk and fell asleep at the wheel. I'm not trying to make excuses.
But I never ever would have done such a thing on purpose. And if there were
some way I could go back and change it, I would.
In fact, I've been sober ever since.
Now I'm paying for my crime by being incarcerated two weeks a year for the
next 10 years.
This blog follows my journey afterward, trying to put my life back together in
between spending a week in jail at Christmas and at Father's Day each year.
I spoke at Hunter's Lane High School two days this week, on Tuesday and on Friday. I have reached out to all the freshmen in the school, and have imparted to them my wisdom about what can happen if you drink and drive. I feel like they really listened with their ears and hearts.
It was weird being at my alma mater under those circumstances, to stand up there and admit that I killed a man while drinking and driving. I had not stepped foot into the school in the past 20 years since I graduated in May 1992
I graduated with an honors diploma and was in the top 10 percent of my class. I was in the Madrigals, a singing group you had to audition to be a part of. I have fond memories of getting dressed up in my dress and going places and singing with the group in high school. I also have fond memories of football and basketball games and the proms junior and senior year.
So, I told the kids those things, as I introduced myself to them. I let them know I had a normal high school experience and was very successful academically while attending Hunter's Lane. I let them know I went to college at Western Kentucky University and majored in print journalism and french. I let them know I got married young, at age 19, and had three kids by the time I was 24. I got married, had three kids and still graduated from college in my chosen major. I was determined to succeed. And I did for a while before King Alcohol took away my choices and took my life and Eddy McCreery's life down with it.
I talked about how I binge drank from an early age. Most people just call it getting wasted or getting drunk. I drank to get drunk every time. I never drank for the taste or just to drink one drink. It continued, although somewhat in the background of my life, into my early adulthood, through my twenties and thirties.
They say in my 12-step program that alcoholism is a progressive disease, and looking back, I can see how it progressed from getting wasted once in a while as a teenager to being a weekend warrior in my twenties to going out to bars, drinking and driving home in my thirties.
Even though alcohol was sort of in the background at times, it was present, along with marijuana and Xanax. And ultimately it was the combination of alcohol and Xanax that took away my choices, that took away my ability to make a rational decision on whether to drink or drive, ultimately causing Eddy McCreery's death.
I read stories today on the Internet about celebrities like Whitney Houston, who reportedly died as a result of a combination of Xanax, Valium and alcohol, and it makes me sad. I don't know why Xanax is a legal prescription drug. It's like alcohol in a pill form. It is dangerous, and in my case and reportedly Whitney Houston's case, it was deadly.
One thing I encouraged the students to do was to go home and look up the word blackout on the net. I was in a blackout the night Eddy McCreery died. I was not capable of making a decision on whether to drink and drive. That's why I say that alcohol and Xanax took away my choices.
Yes, I chose to take the Xanax after drinking the alcohol. It was by far the biggest mistake I have ever made in my life. I only wish someone had saw fit to stop me from getting behind the wheel.
Several people could have, but no one did. I'm not saying it is anyone's fault, but my own.. But the fact is that I was with several other people that night, and no one looked out for me. They all told my attorney that I was drunk, when questioned as a part of my defense, and no one cared enough to make sure I got home safely. I don't know what to make of that. I only know that it is true that birds of a feather flock together, and most of the time when people are with their friends they emulate their behavior. That was certainly true with me. And that's why I told the kids to be careful who they hang around.
I am not naive enough to believe that I am going to stop these teenagers from every taking a drink, although I wish that were true. I was a bit scared to go this far, but I ended up telling the kids from my heart that I believe that alcohol is evil. It's a legal drug. Our society is so pervasive with messages about alcohol. Commercials make alcohol use look cool. But I'm here to tell you that it is not cool. It ruined my life, for a time, and it is the reason that Eddy McCreery is no longer here to be with his family.
I am sorry if this blog turns anyone off. I can only speak from my experience, and my experience shows that alcohol can be deadly, if used in certain circumstances, like drinking and driving. I will stand against this deadly foe at every turn. I will educate youth and those in treatment facilities about what can happen if you drink and drive for the rest of my life. I feel like it's that important.
I can only hope I save some of these kids from going down the wrong road, drinking because they think it's cool, getting behind the wheel of a car afterward because they think it can't happen to them. I also hope I save them a lot of pain in the long run. I am hurting for having done this to the McCreery family, to myself and to my family. I hurt everyday. And I know the ripple effect the damage I did has had on everyone around me. It destroyed two families.
However, I think it's also important to point out that God is restoring me, a little bit at a time. He took a tragedy and turned it into something positive. He gave me this testimony to affect lives, and he's given me another chance to restore myself with my new job.
It felt so good to be able to give my parents rent money this week and to buy clothes for myself and my family.
I am hopeful now. I know things can and will get better, one day at a time.
Prayer: God, thank you for the blessings you have shown me. Please give me the strength to face whatever comes. I pray this in Jesus' name. Amen.
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Monday, February 13, 2012
Portland High speaks out
One Woman's Journey After Vehicular Homicide
Imagine going to sleep, waking up and finding out you killed somebody.
That's exactly what happened to me.
Two years ago, I was drunk and fell asleep at the wheel. I'm not trying to make excuses.
But I never ever would have done such a thing on purpose. And if there were
some way I could go back and change it, I would.
In fact, I've been sober ever since.
Now I'm paying for my crime by being incarcerated two weeks a year for the
next 10 years.
This blog follows my journey afterward, trying to put my life back together in
between spending a week in jail at Christmas and at Father's Day each year.
It occurred to me over the weekend that I focused too much on the negative responses - a few of the 60 or so I received - in my last post.
Overall, the Portland High School students really seemed to get it.
My message is simple: It's not OK to drink and drive under any circumstances.
I know this because I am responsible for Eddy McCreery's death. He died because I took Xanax, drank wine and got behind the wheel of a car.
I'm not proud of that fact, but I know this: I will work as hard as I can to tell as many students as possible what happened. My hope is to spare them and potential victims and their families everywhere the pain that I have to live with the rest of my life, a pain the McCreerys have to live with daily.
Naysayers may question my motives, my methods and even my words to gauge my sincerity. But you don't have to listen to me.
Listen to the kids that were there. One thing I did ask them was whether I should continue to make the WSMV footage of my arrest and subsequent news stories and the audio of the 911 call that night a part of my presentation.
Here's what some of the students had to say:
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I think it was great that you still come to schools and hospitals to talk about your story. I'm so sorry that you had to go through with all of that. The video and tape was very effective, and that you should keep showing it to students and families. I'm really glad that you found God, and that you are now clean and sober.
...
The presentation was very informative, and I am very thankful that you came and spoke to us and made this strive to make it known what the consequences. The video and phone call were very heartbreaking, and I'm very sorry you have to live with the pain.
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I thought it was overall a good/effective presentation.
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The presentation was good. I believe that whoever you tell this to will surely change their mind. I don't think you need to change your presentation. It is good as it is. This is what it takes to get it through people's heads. So don't change what you're doing.
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I think your presentation was very touching, and it made me think about my choices. The 911 call is a good thing to use to get people's attention. I appreciate what you are doing. Thank you. I am a parent, so I feel for you, your mother and the family. I can't imagine anybody going through that.
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I believe the presentation went really well. It was informative, and although I do not drink and do not have any intention of doing so, it definitely changed my view of drinking and driving. The 911 call was a bit graphic. I wouldn't use it for any classes under our age group, but it was a great tool for classes our age. I appreciate your being willing to speak in front of classes. I know that it must be hard for you, but it can definitely change people's lives, as I'm sure you've probably already changed several.
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I thought the presentation was very important, as well as influencial. I hope that your dreams of becoming a journalist fulfill you, and I hope that your pain doesn't overwhelm you from what God has in store for you.
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I thought this speaking opened up a lot of people's eyes, it had me tearing up. I hope that no one ever drinks and drives. It's also good that you've been saved by God. Everything that happened, it happened for a reason. Keep your head up, and don't lose faith, and live one day at a time. I wish the best for you. I hope that one day the family forgives you.
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I think that your story is really sad. I can't relate to how you may have felt or feel. I think it takes a big person to admit you've done something wrong, and that you share your story. My prayers go out to you.
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This presentation was very informative about drunk-driving. The 911 call was very realistic. The video brought the situation to life for me personally. I now will NEVER drink and drive or drink at all. Thank you for coming. It was a really great presentation.
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It gives me chills to even hear the story. I can't even imagine such a tragedy, all just because of alcohol and one mistake. I feel sorry for you because it was an accident. All because just one day you drank alcohol. You have lost everything in your life. You telling that story changed my whole outlook on alcohol. You are my hero. You are a wonderful person. And I thank you so much.
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I think your presentation went very well. You showed me that even a little alcohol could make a large impact on your life. I'm an athlete at this school, and that showed me that making one little mistake could take all my dreams away from me. I just want to say thank you for coming to talk to us today. I feel you have changed a bunch of people's views on drinking and driving. Thanks so much and God bless you.
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I am a non-user of any drugs, but this presentation has made me thankful that people that has been in your situation who has had to have been force by a court order to talk about one mistake, but they continue to talk to children or in our case, teens about your story. It's inspired me to teach other people. I was glad to hear you found a cure to your illness and have been sober for this long. Keep it up. God bless you., and I will keep you and the family in my prayers.
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This presentation has made me think that some things happen for a reason, even though the things that happen may not affect you. It always affects others. The video and audio definitely should be included in future presentations. Thank you and God bless you.
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I really loved hearing your story. My mother was arrested for DUI a year ago, and hearing your story will help me talk to her more about drinking and driving. Your story was very helpful. Thank you. It's perfect just the way it is.
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I think you were brave enough to talk about everything. You're doing really well helping people realize what all went down and how it played out 10 years is a good amount for going around. But I believe you did a great job and not the best way to be punished for a crazy night, but the best way for not remembering I suppose.
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I thought that your presentation was very good. I think that the DVD is a good idea. I don't think the tape is a good idea. I thought that you did a good job.
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I think that it was allright. Just keep it up and keep on talking to kids so they know not to drink and drive. You did great so keep it up. You are awesome. You just keep getting the word out to kids and adults.
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I think you should keep the audio recording because it is a good way for teens to understand the way the daughter felt about the accident and the impact it had on her life.
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I think that the video was good because it really made a point, and it got across.
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I personally think you did a wonderful job. Keep going the way you are and don't change anything within your presentation. Everyone makes mistakes. We're human. It's weird how one mistake can ruin your life. Thank you for your testimony. You have a lot of courage, and I admire you and appreciate that. Stay God strong.
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In my opinion, I think the presentation was more than okay. I think it takes a lot to mention anything to anybody about what happened. You have a lot of courage to do so. You are most definitely in my prayers. Don't let anyone tell you you are a bad person for that. You have made a mistake. That's part of human nature. You have bettered yourself because of this situation, and I think that is a great thing.
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It's a great way to open teens' eyes about drunk driving. Keep up the good work.
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I thought it was very brave of you to come and talk with us today. Your story touched my heart. It must be really hard to come and speak to strangers about something so serious as this, on his birthday, with people judging you. It's very brave, to show other people what you have done wrong, and what you're doing to try to make it better to the best that you can. God is amazing, and the fact that the entire time you've had this going on, you've had him in your heart. I want to thank you for coming in. You did really well.
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I believe that the video was something that should be showed. It makes the kids realize how much impact on the family and it could be them that could've made the mistake that you did, along with the audio. I understand that everyone makes mistakes, and that yours just so happens to be as tragic as what happened to you and Eddie. It touched me, and made me realize I'll never drink and drive. I believe you did a great job, and you're a very strong person for what you're doing.
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I believe that the video was very good. The 911 call that you play impacted me and I'm sure the kids around. I have had a close family member pass away for abusing many drugs at a party. Her friends ended up leaving her so she had to call her parents to come get her. They found my 17-year-old cousin dead the next day on her bed because of making one mistake one night by listening to her friends. Your story touched me very much. I think you did a great job. You're one strong girl!
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Your story is extremely impacting. I have not ever been a fan of alcohol, but now I know I won't mess with it. The presentation was beautiful and heart-touching. The audio and video made it hit home. It made it all very real, and I quickly realized it wasn't just a story, but a real thing. I'm glad you have turned your life around.
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Trina, I have came from an alcoholic and drug-addicted father, who has loved drinking more than his children. Your presentation showed me the positive side of every situation. I have had a lot of hatred toward my dad for his choices, but now I have learned to love him. I pray that you continue this message with more schools and people to spread the word of this. I hope to see your presentation again because of the truth behind your story.
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Your story was very touching. One of my best friends had died in a drinking and driving accident. I didn't know what I would do after that but understanding where you are coming from. I think that the video is a good asset to the presentation, although the audio version is what needs to be heard. You're doinga very good job with changing people's lives. Thank you sor sharing your story with us.
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I think this presentation was very informative. It got me thinking. And I think it will be helpful in making teens understand how dangerous and hurtful drinking and driving can be.
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I really respected the presentation. I saw you last semester, in October, and it completely changed the way I saw my future. I will not drink and I will surely not drink and drive. Always use the audio and video. It impacted my life in a big way, and I hope it does other kids. I dream of being a singer, and I hpe you achieve your dreams as well.
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I find it really touching. I have an uncle who is a heavy drinker, and me personally, I do not like any kind of drinking. I really like the video and audio. It helped me realize exactly how bad it can get. I never knew how bad it could get, and I will never again drink in my life. The audio was really touching, and yes, you should use it.
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It got to me a bit. I know the outcome wasn't good for their family. It is great that you have sobered up. All around, great presentation.
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I feel that the video was helpful and the audio made me feel like I could begin to feel how Faith felt. I think it is good, so it could help someone not drink and drive. I saw this last semester, and it helped me not to be around someone when they're drinking. Thank you for speaking again.
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I do think the video and the 911 call was both very impactful. I think that showing both is very powerful to both students and adults.
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I thought it was really upsetting about the family's grief. I was holding back tears. I can't say that what you did was wrong. I can't judge anyone. It really made me stop and think about drinking and driving. I don't have much else to say, but God bless you and your family.
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I think you did very well with your presentation. I think it definitely got a message across to all of the people in this room. I think it was good that you played the audio and showed the video. I also think you were very strong while standing up there speaking. God bless you.
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I thought it was very informational. The video and audio was a great source but a little disturbing at some points. This especially helped because a similar situation happened to my cousin, but they shocked him back to life a couple times and saved his life.
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Presentation was great. Playing the video and audio made a much larger impact. Got the message across strongly.
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I know you're a changed person. Today when you talked to us about how you killed someone by drinking and driving; it really made me never want to do that..One accident can change your life. But God is with you, and I love you for changing. Thanks for talking to us!
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Your presentation did touch me and made me think twice about my decisions. I am a binge drinker myself, and have feared that it is turning into a problem. As a parent, I can't imagine going through what the family of the man you hit went through, but also what you went through. I think you should definitely keep the 911 audio. It really gets through to people. But instead of telling people to only listen to God, tell people to make better decisions for themselves. Please keep using the 911 audio.
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I thought it was a good one, but still sad to here it. I think you should keep the audio cause it does make an impact.
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I thought it was a good presentation, and that if it hadn't happened you would not be the person today. Like it's not good that he died, but it's good that you found God, and got clean from drugs because I myself have had a drug problem and it took a lot for me to realize drugs weren't only affecting me, but the people around me.
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It was good. The audio was the most touching part, to hear it happening. It was very informational, and I will never drink and drive. It was a good thing.
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It was a good presentation. I think it makes people really think about what happened. The 911 call was very sad, but I think you should've played it, and play it at all your presentations. It was a really good presentation.
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The 911 recording was not too much. It was what solidified everything you said and let people's emotions truly flow so that they know what can happen if they did something like this. May God be with you as you tell your story.
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I'm just glad you came in today and talked to us about this. Thank you so much. I now know how bad it is to drink.
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Just hearing about this story made my life change when she said that is the end of my presentation. It made my outlook about everything, but it's a bad choice. But look at it this way everyone makes mistakes. Not anyone on this earth is perfect. It was just weird hearing her scream for her dad, and another way to look at it is, hey, things always happen for a reason. Maybe God made that night happen because he knew you could change lives with it. Maybe it happened because he wanted you to do this. He wanted you to talk to teenagers because if it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have known what it can do to you. Like you said, you practically lost your life and just sitting here thinking you can live life and be happy without it. You can have a very good time. You don't need it for any of these things, and I just want to thank you and I want to thank God for letting you come here and changing my life. I really do appreciate it, and God bless you as well. And hope you don't ever make choices like that ever again.
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Drinking and driving is worse than just drinking. If you drink period, you can't really focus. To hear your story, it really makes me think about not drinking as much as I want to. My boyfriend is not a drinker, and I don't really like to, but maybe every once in a while, like once every few months. But I'm thankful for him to tell me to stop drinking period because I never want to get into a vehicle while intoxicated. I could accidentally get into a vehicle. I really don't agree with your sentence or why you're not in prison, but you're very lucky, and with your speech, it has left an impact on my life because my father died at the wheel unintoxicated, by an intoxicated man. I'm in the same position as Faith because I seen my father die at the scene of the accident. God bless you and his family!
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This story has given me a different outlook on drinking or doing any kinds of drugs. I can say that this has changed my look of doing anything. This is very sad. But I can say this has changed my ways of doing things. Yes, you should do this again. I think it will change other kids lives like it will mine. How is it like being away from your kids? Do you see your kids now? How is it going to jail on Father's Day and on Christmas? Like does it make others realize how hard it is for you? Do you have things you had before this happened? You did a great thing showing this.
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During the whole presentation, I felt so sad. Hearing what she has to say touched my heart and my mind in a way that could never be explained in words. After hearing the impact it had on his daughter, it just broke my heart. I think she should keep the audio and video, so other students can hopefully learn and realize that no one should every drink and drive.
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This presentation has really changed my outlook on drinking. Not just drinking and driving, but drinking alone. My stepdad drinks every so often. So I do it too sometimes. But I definitely won't be anymore. I did like the audio and video. You should keep using it in your presentation. Thank you for coming and speaking with us. It has definitely changed my perspective about drinking. Thank you, again. I know it takes a lot of nerve to get up there and talk, not knowing what people are going to say or think. So, I do have a lot of respect for you for that.
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First off, I wanted to say thank you because you have changed the way I think about DUIs and alcoholism. I also wanted to say that I think you are incredibly strong to share your story with people. I know that I will think about how alcohol can affect you. God bless you, and I want you to know that I will keep you in my prayers.
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I thought she was one of the best speakers that has came and talked to us. Her story was very touching to me, and it honestly broke my heart. If I was her, it wouldn't be that easy for me to talk to kids about what happened. She's a very strong woman, and from now on, I'll look up to her. Her story means a lot to me, and I'll remember that story for the rest of my life. I know it has to be hard for her to live everyday with the fact of knowing what she did, even though she didn't mean to. I really appreciate everything she's said today, and it really put a place in my heart.
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Hearing this story shocked me. To hear how both sides of this story hurt, even the side that caused it. The 911 call was upsetting. The girl's screams and sobs broke my heart. I'm about to be 16. I'll be driving soon, and even though I already know not to drive and drink, I will be the person to take someone's keys. I pray for the family and the victim. Use the video and audio. It really helps the story.
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What I think about her presentation is a lot. My whole entire Dad's side of the family has at least killed two people. So honestly, I know how it feels. My real dad's side is all gang members. They drink and do drugs. So now, I really don't know. I don't know how to feel.
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I feel like it was a very sad thing what happened. It has made me realize that little things can change something in a second. Drinking and driving is an awful thing. I have drank before but hearing you talk and tell us what happened has made me really stop and think about things. It is great that you stopped using drugs and drinking alcohol. Yes, you made a mistake, and we all make mistakes. You found God and are trying to make peace. You are right, if this never would have happened, you would probably still be drinking and doing drugs today. It's wonderful that you encourage others not to drink and drive, and that you are trying to make peace.
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The story that this lady told me had a big impact on my life. Everything she said to me meant something that drinking is bad, and it could take someone's life. Having to live on that kind of impact tears my heart into a million pieces. I will do my best not to overrun what was said. Because if I have ever went down like that, I don't think I could live with myself.
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This is the second time I've heard you about this. And I believe that you have done a better job this time than when I heard you on the anniversary in October 2011. I believe this is a great/wonderful thing that you are doing, and the fact that you are doing it without community service is astonishing. I find it wonderful, beyond wonderful that you have chosen to find God and let him help you through this. I believe with the help of our savior, you can get through anything. Just have faith and hope because I have hope and faith in you.
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I felt like it was an inspiring story because it shows what alcohol really does to you. It does horrible things, especially when you get behind the wheel o f a car. I know people that has been drunk and drove, but never wrecked. But it changes your mind about alcohol and things that can happen when you are under the influence.
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I felt like her story teaches me to not drink and drive. It teaches me the signs on when to stop and call a friend to pick me up. It tells people that it is a very serious thing to worry about.
Imagine going to sleep, waking up and finding out you killed somebody.
That's exactly what happened to me.
Two years ago, I was drunk and fell asleep at the wheel. I'm not trying to make excuses.
But I never ever would have done such a thing on purpose. And if there were
some way I could go back and change it, I would.
In fact, I've been sober ever since.
Now I'm paying for my crime by being incarcerated two weeks a year for the
next 10 years.
This blog follows my journey afterward, trying to put my life back together in
between spending a week in jail at Christmas and at Father's Day each year.
It occurred to me over the weekend that I focused too much on the negative responses - a few of the 60 or so I received - in my last post.
Overall, the Portland High School students really seemed to get it.
My message is simple: It's not OK to drink and drive under any circumstances.
I know this because I am responsible for Eddy McCreery's death. He died because I took Xanax, drank wine and got behind the wheel of a car.
I'm not proud of that fact, but I know this: I will work as hard as I can to tell as many students as possible what happened. My hope is to spare them and potential victims and their families everywhere the pain that I have to live with the rest of my life, a pain the McCreerys have to live with daily.
Naysayers may question my motives, my methods and even my words to gauge my sincerity. But you don't have to listen to me.
Listen to the kids that were there. One thing I did ask them was whether I should continue to make the WSMV footage of my arrest and subsequent news stories and the audio of the 911 call that night a part of my presentation.
Here's what some of the students had to say:
...
I think it was great that you still come to schools and hospitals to talk about your story. I'm so sorry that you had to go through with all of that. The video and tape was very effective, and that you should keep showing it to students and families. I'm really glad that you found God, and that you are now clean and sober.
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The presentation was very informative, and I am very thankful that you came and spoke to us and made this strive to make it known what the consequences. The video and phone call were very heartbreaking, and I'm very sorry you have to live with the pain.
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- 911 call helped me visualize how bad the accident was.
- Program was Really good.
I thought it was overall a good/effective presentation.
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The presentation was good. I believe that whoever you tell this to will surely change their mind. I don't think you need to change your presentation. It is good as it is. This is what it takes to get it through people's heads. So don't change what you're doing.
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I think your presentation was very touching, and it made me think about my choices. The 911 call is a good thing to use to get people's attention. I appreciate what you are doing. Thank you. I am a parent, so I feel for you, your mother and the family. I can't imagine anybody going through that.
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I believe the presentation went really well. It was informative, and although I do not drink and do not have any intention of doing so, it definitely changed my view of drinking and driving. The 911 call was a bit graphic. I wouldn't use it for any classes under our age group, but it was a great tool for classes our age. I appreciate your being willing to speak in front of classes. I know that it must be hard for you, but it can definitely change people's lives, as I'm sure you've probably already changed several.
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I thought the presentation was very important, as well as influencial. I hope that your dreams of becoming a journalist fulfill you, and I hope that your pain doesn't overwhelm you from what God has in store for you.
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I thought this speaking opened up a lot of people's eyes, it had me tearing up. I hope that no one ever drinks and drives. It's also good that you've been saved by God. Everything that happened, it happened for a reason. Keep your head up, and don't lose faith, and live one day at a time. I wish the best for you. I hope that one day the family forgives you.
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I think that your story is really sad. I can't relate to how you may have felt or feel. I think it takes a big person to admit you've done something wrong, and that you share your story. My prayers go out to you.
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This presentation was very informative about drunk-driving. The 911 call was very realistic. The video brought the situation to life for me personally. I now will NEVER drink and drive or drink at all. Thank you for coming. It was a really great presentation.
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It gives me chills to even hear the story. I can't even imagine such a tragedy, all just because of alcohol and one mistake. I feel sorry for you because it was an accident. All because just one day you drank alcohol. You have lost everything in your life. You telling that story changed my whole outlook on alcohol. You are my hero. You are a wonderful person. And I thank you so much.
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I think your presentation went very well. You showed me that even a little alcohol could make a large impact on your life. I'm an athlete at this school, and that showed me that making one little mistake could take all my dreams away from me. I just want to say thank you for coming to talk to us today. I feel you have changed a bunch of people's views on drinking and driving. Thanks so much and God bless you.
...
I am a non-user of any drugs, but this presentation has made me thankful that people that has been in your situation who has had to have been force by a court order to talk about one mistake, but they continue to talk to children or in our case, teens about your story. It's inspired me to teach other people. I was glad to hear you found a cure to your illness and have been sober for this long. Keep it up. God bless you., and I will keep you and the family in my prayers.
...
This presentation has made me think that some things happen for a reason, even though the things that happen may not affect you. It always affects others. The video and audio definitely should be included in future presentations. Thank you and God bless you.
...
I really loved hearing your story. My mother was arrested for DUI a year ago, and hearing your story will help me talk to her more about drinking and driving. Your story was very helpful. Thank you. It's perfect just the way it is.
...
I think you were brave enough to talk about everything. You're doing really well helping people realize what all went down and how it played out 10 years is a good amount for going around. But I believe you did a great job and not the best way to be punished for a crazy night, but the best way for not remembering I suppose.
...
I thought that your presentation was very good. I think that the DVD is a good idea. I don't think the tape is a good idea. I thought that you did a good job.
...
I think that it was allright. Just keep it up and keep on talking to kids so they know not to drink and drive. You did great so keep it up. You are awesome. You just keep getting the word out to kids and adults.
...
I think you should keep the audio recording because it is a good way for teens to understand the way the daughter felt about the accident and the impact it had on her life.
...
I think that the video was good because it really made a point, and it got across.
...
I personally think you did a wonderful job. Keep going the way you are and don't change anything within your presentation. Everyone makes mistakes. We're human. It's weird how one mistake can ruin your life. Thank you for your testimony. You have a lot of courage, and I admire you and appreciate that. Stay God strong.
...
In my opinion, I think the presentation was more than okay. I think it takes a lot to mention anything to anybody about what happened. You have a lot of courage to do so. You are most definitely in my prayers. Don't let anyone tell you you are a bad person for that. You have made a mistake. That's part of human nature. You have bettered yourself because of this situation, and I think that is a great thing.
...
It's a great way to open teens' eyes about drunk driving. Keep up the good work.
...
I thought it was very brave of you to come and talk with us today. Your story touched my heart. It must be really hard to come and speak to strangers about something so serious as this, on his birthday, with people judging you. It's very brave, to show other people what you have done wrong, and what you're doing to try to make it better to the best that you can. God is amazing, and the fact that the entire time you've had this going on, you've had him in your heart. I want to thank you for coming in. You did really well.
...
I believe that the video was something that should be showed. It makes the kids realize how much impact on the family and it could be them that could've made the mistake that you did, along with the audio. I understand that everyone makes mistakes, and that yours just so happens to be as tragic as what happened to you and Eddie. It touched me, and made me realize I'll never drink and drive. I believe you did a great job, and you're a very strong person for what you're doing.
...
I believe that the video was very good. The 911 call that you play impacted me and I'm sure the kids around. I have had a close family member pass away for abusing many drugs at a party. Her friends ended up leaving her so she had to call her parents to come get her. They found my 17-year-old cousin dead the next day on her bed because of making one mistake one night by listening to her friends. Your story touched me very much. I think you did a great job. You're one strong girl!
...
Your story is extremely impacting. I have not ever been a fan of alcohol, but now I know I won't mess with it. The presentation was beautiful and heart-touching. The audio and video made it hit home. It made it all very real, and I quickly realized it wasn't just a story, but a real thing. I'm glad you have turned your life around.
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Trina, I have came from an alcoholic and drug-addicted father, who has loved drinking more than his children. Your presentation showed me the positive side of every situation. I have had a lot of hatred toward my dad for his choices, but now I have learned to love him. I pray that you continue this message with more schools and people to spread the word of this. I hope to see your presentation again because of the truth behind your story.
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Your story was very touching. One of my best friends had died in a drinking and driving accident. I didn't know what I would do after that but understanding where you are coming from. I think that the video is a good asset to the presentation, although the audio version is what needs to be heard. You're doinga very good job with changing people's lives. Thank you sor sharing your story with us.
...
I think this presentation was very informative. It got me thinking. And I think it will be helpful in making teens understand how dangerous and hurtful drinking and driving can be.
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I really respected the presentation. I saw you last semester, in October, and it completely changed the way I saw my future. I will not drink and I will surely not drink and drive. Always use the audio and video. It impacted my life in a big way, and I hope it does other kids. I dream of being a singer, and I hpe you achieve your dreams as well.
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I find it really touching. I have an uncle who is a heavy drinker, and me personally, I do not like any kind of drinking. I really like the video and audio. It helped me realize exactly how bad it can get. I never knew how bad it could get, and I will never again drink in my life. The audio was really touching, and yes, you should use it.
...
It got to me a bit. I know the outcome wasn't good for their family. It is great that you have sobered up. All around, great presentation.
...
I feel that the video was helpful and the audio made me feel like I could begin to feel how Faith felt. I think it is good, so it could help someone not drink and drive. I saw this last semester, and it helped me not to be around someone when they're drinking. Thank you for speaking again.
...
I do think the video and the 911 call was both very impactful. I think that showing both is very powerful to both students and adults.
...
I thought it was really upsetting about the family's grief. I was holding back tears. I can't say that what you did was wrong. I can't judge anyone. It really made me stop and think about drinking and driving. I don't have much else to say, but God bless you and your family.
...
I think you did very well with your presentation. I think it definitely got a message across to all of the people in this room. I think it was good that you played the audio and showed the video. I also think you were very strong while standing up there speaking. God bless you.
...
I thought it was very informational. The video and audio was a great source but a little disturbing at some points. This especially helped because a similar situation happened to my cousin, but they shocked him back to life a couple times and saved his life.
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Presentation was great. Playing the video and audio made a much larger impact. Got the message across strongly.
...
I know you're a changed person. Today when you talked to us about how you killed someone by drinking and driving; it really made me never want to do that..One accident can change your life. But God is with you, and I love you for changing. Thanks for talking to us!
...
Your presentation did touch me and made me think twice about my decisions. I am a binge drinker myself, and have feared that it is turning into a problem. As a parent, I can't imagine going through what the family of the man you hit went through, but also what you went through. I think you should definitely keep the 911 audio. It really gets through to people. But instead of telling people to only listen to God, tell people to make better decisions for themselves. Please keep using the 911 audio.
...
I thought it was a good one, but still sad to here it. I think you should keep the audio cause it does make an impact.
...
I thought it was a good presentation, and that if it hadn't happened you would not be the person today. Like it's not good that he died, but it's good that you found God, and got clean from drugs because I myself have had a drug problem and it took a lot for me to realize drugs weren't only affecting me, but the people around me.
...
It was good. The audio was the most touching part, to hear it happening. It was very informational, and I will never drink and drive. It was a good thing.
...
It was a good presentation. I think it makes people really think about what happened. The 911 call was very sad, but I think you should've played it, and play it at all your presentations. It was a really good presentation.
...
The 911 recording was not too much. It was what solidified everything you said and let people's emotions truly flow so that they know what can happen if they did something like this. May God be with you as you tell your story.
...
I'm just glad you came in today and talked to us about this. Thank you so much. I now know how bad it is to drink.
...
Just hearing about this story made my life change when she said that is the end of my presentation. It made my outlook about everything, but it's a bad choice. But look at it this way everyone makes mistakes. Not anyone on this earth is perfect. It was just weird hearing her scream for her dad, and another way to look at it is, hey, things always happen for a reason. Maybe God made that night happen because he knew you could change lives with it. Maybe it happened because he wanted you to do this. He wanted you to talk to teenagers because if it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have known what it can do to you. Like you said, you practically lost your life and just sitting here thinking you can live life and be happy without it. You can have a very good time. You don't need it for any of these things, and I just want to thank you and I want to thank God for letting you come here and changing my life. I really do appreciate it, and God bless you as well. And hope you don't ever make choices like that ever again.
...
Drinking and driving is worse than just drinking. If you drink period, you can't really focus. To hear your story, it really makes me think about not drinking as much as I want to. My boyfriend is not a drinker, and I don't really like to, but maybe every once in a while, like once every few months. But I'm thankful for him to tell me to stop drinking period because I never want to get into a vehicle while intoxicated. I could accidentally get into a vehicle. I really don't agree with your sentence or why you're not in prison, but you're very lucky, and with your speech, it has left an impact on my life because my father died at the wheel unintoxicated, by an intoxicated man. I'm in the same position as Faith because I seen my father die at the scene of the accident. God bless you and his family!
...
This story has given me a different outlook on drinking or doing any kinds of drugs. I can say that this has changed my look of doing anything. This is very sad. But I can say this has changed my ways of doing things. Yes, you should do this again. I think it will change other kids lives like it will mine. How is it like being away from your kids? Do you see your kids now? How is it going to jail on Father's Day and on Christmas? Like does it make others realize how hard it is for you? Do you have things you had before this happened? You did a great thing showing this.
...
During the whole presentation, I felt so sad. Hearing what she has to say touched my heart and my mind in a way that could never be explained in words. After hearing the impact it had on his daughter, it just broke my heart. I think she should keep the audio and video, so other students can hopefully learn and realize that no one should every drink and drive.
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This presentation has really changed my outlook on drinking. Not just drinking and driving, but drinking alone. My stepdad drinks every so often. So I do it too sometimes. But I definitely won't be anymore. I did like the audio and video. You should keep using it in your presentation. Thank you for coming and speaking with us. It has definitely changed my perspective about drinking. Thank you, again. I know it takes a lot of nerve to get up there and talk, not knowing what people are going to say or think. So, I do have a lot of respect for you for that.
...
First off, I wanted to say thank you because you have changed the way I think about DUIs and alcoholism. I also wanted to say that I think you are incredibly strong to share your story with people. I know that I will think about how alcohol can affect you. God bless you, and I want you to know that I will keep you in my prayers.
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I thought she was one of the best speakers that has came and talked to us. Her story was very touching to me, and it honestly broke my heart. If I was her, it wouldn't be that easy for me to talk to kids about what happened. She's a very strong woman, and from now on, I'll look up to her. Her story means a lot to me, and I'll remember that story for the rest of my life. I know it has to be hard for her to live everyday with the fact of knowing what she did, even though she didn't mean to. I really appreciate everything she's said today, and it really put a place in my heart.
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Hearing this story shocked me. To hear how both sides of this story hurt, even the side that caused it. The 911 call was upsetting. The girl's screams and sobs broke my heart. I'm about to be 16. I'll be driving soon, and even though I already know not to drive and drink, I will be the person to take someone's keys. I pray for the family and the victim. Use the video and audio. It really helps the story.
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What I think about her presentation is a lot. My whole entire Dad's side of the family has at least killed two people. So honestly, I know how it feels. My real dad's side is all gang members. They drink and do drugs. So now, I really don't know. I don't know how to feel.
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I feel like it was a very sad thing what happened. It has made me realize that little things can change something in a second. Drinking and driving is an awful thing. I have drank before but hearing you talk and tell us what happened has made me really stop and think about things. It is great that you stopped using drugs and drinking alcohol. Yes, you made a mistake, and we all make mistakes. You found God and are trying to make peace. You are right, if this never would have happened, you would probably still be drinking and doing drugs today. It's wonderful that you encourage others not to drink and drive, and that you are trying to make peace.
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The story that this lady told me had a big impact on my life. Everything she said to me meant something that drinking is bad, and it could take someone's life. Having to live on that kind of impact tears my heart into a million pieces. I will do my best not to overrun what was said. Because if I have ever went down like that, I don't think I could live with myself.
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This is the second time I've heard you about this. And I believe that you have done a better job this time than when I heard you on the anniversary in October 2011. I believe this is a great/wonderful thing that you are doing, and the fact that you are doing it without community service is astonishing. I find it wonderful, beyond wonderful that you have chosen to find God and let him help you through this. I believe with the help of our savior, you can get through anything. Just have faith and hope because I have hope and faith in you.
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I felt like it was an inspiring story because it shows what alcohol really does to you. It does horrible things, especially when you get behind the wheel o f a car. I know people that has been drunk and drove, but never wrecked. But it changes your mind about alcohol and things that can happen when you are under the influence.
...
I felt like her story teaches me to not drink and drive. It teaches me the signs on when to stop and call a friend to pick me up. It tells people that it is a very serious thing to worry about.
Friday, February 10, 2012
Speech at Portland High School
One Woman's Journey After Vehicular Homicide
Imagine going to sleep, waking up and finding out you killed somebody.
That's exactly what happened to me.
Two years ago, I was drunk and fell asleep at the wheel. I'm not trying to make excuses.
But I never ever would have done such a thing on purpose. And if there were
some way I could go back and change it, I would.
In fact, I've been sober ever since.
Now I'm paying for my crime by being incarcerated two weeks a year for the
next 10 years.
This blog follows my journey afterward, trying to put my life back together in
between spending a week in jail at Christmas and at Father's Day each year.
I spoke to four blocks of classes at Portland High School today about causing the drunk-driving accident Oct. 22, 2009 that resulted in Eddy McCreery's death.
It's never an easy experience for me. None of this is. Not living this life, admitting my fatal mistake, dealing with the painful consequences for my family and for the McCreery family.
But I do this, partly, yes, because I am court-ordered to speak on Feb. 10 and Oct. 22, McCreery's birthday and the day he died.
But mostly I speak because of the MESSAGE these speaking engagements involve: Don't drink and drive under any circumstances.
I'm not there to make friends or enemies for that matter. I'm not there to try to duck any kind of responsibility I feel for the crime. I'm not there to make the students feel sorry for me.
My calling is to make them think about what can happen and what did happen to me if you drink and drive.
That's the only reason.
I have about 60 responses of feedback from the kids. Most of it was positive. There was a handful that was negative. For some reason, those comments always stick with me more. Call it the devil in the details.
Some didn't like that I used notes to speak. Others thought I didn't show enough emotion or have enough eye contact. One even accused me of exploiting the family's pain.
A teacher not mentioned in this blog even went as far as to say it didn't seem like I was accepting responsibility, and implied my speeches might mistakenly make the kids feel sorry for me. He was conversely complimentary in the same speech, and even applauded me. Needless to say, I was confused.
I can't please everybody, and I'm not going to try.
What I am going to do is keep on knocking on doors at local school districts and asking if they will let me in, give me a venue, a way to reach these kids.
I am hoping the story WSMV-TV Channel 4 aired today will help me in that quest.
It was the first time in my life I have been on the other end of an interview, but I think I did OK. I wasn't as nervous as I thought I would be.
Again, it's about the message. It's about making Eddy McCreery's death mean something, keeping his memory alive, turning a negative event into a positive, one day at a time.
Thank you Portland High School, especially Mr. Gideon, Mrs. McNeil and Mrs. Griffin for opening your doors to me and giving me a way to hopefully impact these students' lives in such a way that if they are ever in the position to make a decision whether to drink and drive or to ride with someone who has indulged in alcohol or drugs, that they will make the right decision.
I want to especially thank Jeremy Johnson and Nancy Morris, of Sumner County Schools, for their roles in facilitating the speeches today.
And thank you momma, Vicky C. and Jennifer Easton for being there to support me in an endeavor that is always tough, but always worth it.
Mom: your support never ceases to amaze me. Vicky: you have shown me love in so many ways. Know that I am here for you, too. You are my family.
Jennifer, thank you for being there, too. Your presence was like a bridge between the past and the present, reminding me of the journalist I used to be, in my dream job, and of the friendships I still have at The Gallatin News Examiner. I miss you, Dessie, and you, too, Sarah, and hope we can see each other again really soon.
Finally, this day would be incomplete without the following thank you.
Thank you, Eddy McCreery, for giving my life purpose, for my sobriety, and for keeping me humble, one day at a time.
Imagine going to sleep, waking up and finding out you killed somebody.
That's exactly what happened to me.
Two years ago, I was drunk and fell asleep at the wheel. I'm not trying to make excuses.
But I never ever would have done such a thing on purpose. And if there were
some way I could go back and change it, I would.
In fact, I've been sober ever since.
Now I'm paying for my crime by being incarcerated two weeks a year for the
next 10 years.
This blog follows my journey afterward, trying to put my life back together in
between spending a week in jail at Christmas and at Father's Day each year.
I spoke to four blocks of classes at Portland High School today about causing the drunk-driving accident Oct. 22, 2009 that resulted in Eddy McCreery's death.
It's never an easy experience for me. None of this is. Not living this life, admitting my fatal mistake, dealing with the painful consequences for my family and for the McCreery family.
But I do this, partly, yes, because I am court-ordered to speak on Feb. 10 and Oct. 22, McCreery's birthday and the day he died.
But mostly I speak because of the MESSAGE these speaking engagements involve: Don't drink and drive under any circumstances.
I'm not there to make friends or enemies for that matter. I'm not there to try to duck any kind of responsibility I feel for the crime. I'm not there to make the students feel sorry for me.
My calling is to make them think about what can happen and what did happen to me if you drink and drive.
That's the only reason.
I have about 60 responses of feedback from the kids. Most of it was positive. There was a handful that was negative. For some reason, those comments always stick with me more. Call it the devil in the details.
Some didn't like that I used notes to speak. Others thought I didn't show enough emotion or have enough eye contact. One even accused me of exploiting the family's pain.
A teacher not mentioned in this blog even went as far as to say it didn't seem like I was accepting responsibility, and implied my speeches might mistakenly make the kids feel sorry for me. He was conversely complimentary in the same speech, and even applauded me. Needless to say, I was confused.
I can't please everybody, and I'm not going to try.
What I am going to do is keep on knocking on doors at local school districts and asking if they will let me in, give me a venue, a way to reach these kids.
I am hoping the story WSMV-TV Channel 4 aired today will help me in that quest.
It was the first time in my life I have been on the other end of an interview, but I think I did OK. I wasn't as nervous as I thought I would be.
Again, it's about the message. It's about making Eddy McCreery's death mean something, keeping his memory alive, turning a negative event into a positive, one day at a time.
Thank you Portland High School, especially Mr. Gideon, Mrs. McNeil and Mrs. Griffin for opening your doors to me and giving me a way to hopefully impact these students' lives in such a way that if they are ever in the position to make a decision whether to drink and drive or to ride with someone who has indulged in alcohol or drugs, that they will make the right decision.
I want to especially thank Jeremy Johnson and Nancy Morris, of Sumner County Schools, for their roles in facilitating the speeches today.
And thank you momma, Vicky C. and Jennifer Easton for being there to support me in an endeavor that is always tough, but always worth it.
Mom: your support never ceases to amaze me. Vicky: you have shown me love in so many ways. Know that I am here for you, too. You are my family.
Jennifer, thank you for being there, too. Your presence was like a bridge between the past and the present, reminding me of the journalist I used to be, in my dream job, and of the friendships I still have at The Gallatin News Examiner. I miss you, Dessie, and you, too, Sarah, and hope we can see each other again really soon.
Finally, this day would be incomplete without the following thank you.
Thank you, Eddy McCreery, for giving my life purpose, for my sobriety, and for keeping me humble, one day at a time.
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
New job
One Woman's Journey After Vehicular Homicide
Imagine going to sleep, waking up and finding out you killed somebody.
That's exactly what happened to me.
Two years ago, I was drunk and fell asleep at the wheel. I'm not trying to make excuses.
But I never ever would have done such a thing on purpose. And if there were
some way I could go back and change it, I would.
In fact, I've been sober ever since.
Now I'm paying for my crime by being incarcerated two weeks a year for the
next 10 years.
This blog follows my journey afterward, trying to put my life back together in
between spending a week in jail at Christmas and at Father's Day each year.
Today was my first day on the job at Goodwill.
I am training. Today, I didn't do what I would normally be doing, which is processing donated items, but it was still good. I trained under a lady named Ann, and she was really nice.
Today, I took processed items out to the floor and placed them on display for sale.
Then, I watched a two-hour slideshow on the store's standard operating procedures. It was a lot of information.
I am grateful to be part of the working world again.
It had been more than two years since the accident that ended my victim's life and changed my life and the lives of my victim's family forever.
At times, I wondered if I'd ever find any semblance of normalcy.
All I can say is 'God is good.'
I had interviewed at Lowe's last week at two locations: Madison and Hendersonville. I felt like the three interviews I did at those locations went really well.
So, I was surprised and excited when Goodwill called - out of the blue - and offered me the job Monday afternoon.
I really feel like it's a God thing that I was offered this job, and I intend to make the most of it.
In this role, it may seem like I'm primarily focused on myself, but that's really only a portion of the truth.
On Friday, which is my victim's birthday, I will be speaking at Portland High School about my life, my addictions and the events that ended my victim's life.
It never leaves me, as well it shouldn't.
But I didn't want to leave the impression that I'm just going on with my life now, without any thought about the past.
I am still dedicated to telling this story: in hospitals, treatment centers and in local schools.
I have the opportunity now to move into Metro Nashville Public Schools and to spread the message even farther. I don't have firm dates yet, and now, I have a job that has to be factored in, so it's not a done deal.
But I am trying very hard to balance putting my life back together, while still focusing on my victim's death and the new life that resulted in me.
It's very important to me.
Tonight, I will be going to a local hospital and sharing the message with the patients there, in hopes that they won't use drugs or alcohol and get behind the wheel of a car, like I did.
It's ironic. I thought 'I want to go out just one more time.' Six months had passed and I was dry. I was taking prescription Xanax, as directed, and still smoking marijuana. But I hadn't had a drop of alcohol in my body in that time frame.
Just one more time ended in death for my victim and a lifetime for me.
Still, admitting my role in the accident weekly gives me some relief. It gives me hope enough to try to do things like get a job and try to move on with my life.
And that is making all the difference.
Imagine going to sleep, waking up and finding out you killed somebody.
That's exactly what happened to me.
Two years ago, I was drunk and fell asleep at the wheel. I'm not trying to make excuses.
But I never ever would have done such a thing on purpose. And if there were
some way I could go back and change it, I would.
In fact, I've been sober ever since.
Now I'm paying for my crime by being incarcerated two weeks a year for the
next 10 years.
This blog follows my journey afterward, trying to put my life back together in
between spending a week in jail at Christmas and at Father's Day each year.
Today was my first day on the job at Goodwill.
I am training. Today, I didn't do what I would normally be doing, which is processing donated items, but it was still good. I trained under a lady named Ann, and she was really nice.
Today, I took processed items out to the floor and placed them on display for sale.
Then, I watched a two-hour slideshow on the store's standard operating procedures. It was a lot of information.
I am grateful to be part of the working world again.
It had been more than two years since the accident that ended my victim's life and changed my life and the lives of my victim's family forever.
At times, I wondered if I'd ever find any semblance of normalcy.
All I can say is 'God is good.'
I had interviewed at Lowe's last week at two locations: Madison and Hendersonville. I felt like the three interviews I did at those locations went really well.
So, I was surprised and excited when Goodwill called - out of the blue - and offered me the job Monday afternoon.
I really feel like it's a God thing that I was offered this job, and I intend to make the most of it.
In this role, it may seem like I'm primarily focused on myself, but that's really only a portion of the truth.
On Friday, which is my victim's birthday, I will be speaking at Portland High School about my life, my addictions and the events that ended my victim's life.
It never leaves me, as well it shouldn't.
But I didn't want to leave the impression that I'm just going on with my life now, without any thought about the past.
I am still dedicated to telling this story: in hospitals, treatment centers and in local schools.
I have the opportunity now to move into Metro Nashville Public Schools and to spread the message even farther. I don't have firm dates yet, and now, I have a job that has to be factored in, so it's not a done deal.
But I am trying very hard to balance putting my life back together, while still focusing on my victim's death and the new life that resulted in me.
It's very important to me.
Tonight, I will be going to a local hospital and sharing the message with the patients there, in hopes that they won't use drugs or alcohol and get behind the wheel of a car, like I did.
It's ironic. I thought 'I want to go out just one more time.' Six months had passed and I was dry. I was taking prescription Xanax, as directed, and still smoking marijuana. But I hadn't had a drop of alcohol in my body in that time frame.
Just one more time ended in death for my victim and a lifetime for me.
Still, admitting my role in the accident weekly gives me some relief. It gives me hope enough to try to do things like get a job and try to move on with my life.
And that is making all the difference.
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